I’ve been having lustful thoughts and feelings about a man I am not married to and have looked at him and felt lustful. I am fighting it and not pursuing them.
I am apologizing to God and praying for right restored relationship with all I love, and for spiritual strength to resist temptation and remove desire. Please pray for me. I am confessing this publicly because it says “if we confess our sin and witness it publicly He is faithful and just to forgive us.”
Okay, so here it is. I grew up like a princess—not the kind who lives in a palace with butlers, servants, and a crown. I grew up living a good life. In our family, I was their princess since I was the only daughter of my parents. My father worked in another place, so I only saw him once a year, and my mother was a housewife. But she had a business—people pawned their lands and other properties to her, and she also lent money to those in our town.
Since I grew up in the province, I was what they...Okay, so here it is. I grew up like a princess—not the kind who lives in a palace with butlers, servants, and a crown. I grew up living a good life. In our family, I was their princess since I was the only daughter of my parents. My father worked in another place, so I only saw him once a year, and my mother was a housewife. But she had a business—people pawned their lands and other properties to her, and she also lent money to those in our town.
Since I grew up in the province, I was what they called an island girl. I grew up feeling like the world revolved around me. Even in school, I knew I stood out, but I wasn’t like the spoiled brats you see on TV. My parents and grandparents raised me well—I was a kind child, a true dalagang Pilipina, a Maria Clara in short, haha.
Every birthday of mine was grand. Cake? Seven cakes. My feast? A lot. That’s why even some relatives who weren’t invited still showed up.
Fast forward—I was eight years old when my mom got pregnant. So there, I was going to have a sibling. Everything was fine, everything was still okay.
Not until my brother turned two and I turned ten.
2016—the nightmare, the worst event of my life.
My grandfather noticed that my brother had been looking pale for months, which was unusual because ever since he was a baby, his lips and cheeks were always red. So my mom took him for a check-up, and according to the doctor, he needed to be rushed to the hospital immediately because there was a problem with his blood. They couldn’t confirm what it was because the hospital didn’t have advanced technology. So, they brought him to a bigger hospital in our province, which was very far from us.
I was with them at the hospital. That was the first time I experienced being left behind, being alone, and feeling like I didn’t matter.
Maybe others would think, “You’re too much. You’re a useless sister. You knew your brother needed your mom’s attention more, yet you still let jealousy take over.”
Did I want this? Did I want to feel that way? No, I didn’t. Because he’s my brother—I love him. But what could I do? I was just a child back then.
Weeks passed, and my aunt had to take me back home to our island because I wasn’t allowed to stay in the hospital any longer.
Fast forward—that was my nightmare.
That afternoon, when I finally arrived at our house, I didn’t know it would be the last time I would ever see my grandfather.
I was with my two female cousins. We were inside the bedroom of our house when we suddenly heard someone shouting, cursing at our grandfather, challenging him to a fight to the death, yelling that he should come out because he was going to kill him.
We panicked. My cousins and I immediately ran outside, but we were too late. Our grandfather had already stepped out—carrying a bolo.
And that was when I saw how my grandfather fought for his life.
I saw it. We saw it—how he was stabbed multiple times with an ice pick, how he struggled, how he gasped for air. And despite everything, he still managed to tell us not to cry.
My grandfather always had a favorite line—he would always tell us not to cry when he dies because he wasn’t afraid of death.
But that day, as we surrounded him, crying, we saw the fear in his eyes. That was when I realized—he was afraid, but not of dying. He was afraid for himself.
He took off his glasses because his vision was already blurring. We saw his clothes—full of holes, soaked in blood.
That was where it all began—the suffering, the fear, the endless nights of crying. Name it.
That was where my almost perfect life started to fall apart.
The once cheerful child, surrounded by happiness and warmth, would one day reach a point where she would wish to disappear—where she would wish for death.
But God is good—I rose above it all.
For seven years, I endured pain, countless nights filled with tears and fear, and moments when I wanted nothing more than to end it all. My heart was drowning in resentment, hatred, and bitterness. But I survived—by God’s mercy.
I am happy now. I’m in college, taking the first steps toward my dream of becoming a Cabin Crew. I am stronger, unshaken. Everything I went through, I overcame. The seven years I thought would destroy me—I made it through.
Nine years later, my grandfather is gone, but my sibling survived cancer. And I, too, survived. I conquered depression. I became a trauma survivor.
Now, I can finally say—the old me is gone. She died so that I could live.
A Final Farewell – Meracris Casabuena
To the girl I once was—this is our goodbye.
You carried so much pain, so much fear. You held onto wounds that never seemed to heal, nights that felt endless, and a heart too shattered to hope. You were strong, even when you didn’t want to be. You fought, even when you had nothing left. And for that, I honor you.
But now, it’s time to let you go.
I am no longer the girl who begged for love, who was swallowed by grief, who feared being left behind. I have risen from the ashes you once laid in. I have learned to breathe without the weight of yesterday crushing me. I have found joy, purpose, and peace.
So, rest now. Thank you for bringing me here. But from this moment on, I walk forward without you.
I love you.
Goodbye, Meracris.
The girl you saved is finally free.
my best friend dragged me into the middle of her and her boyfriends breakup by blaming me for calling him names through a “breakup survey” he sent her, which she then sent to me and her then manager.
her manager filled it out and he saw it (obviously). our friendship hasn’t been the same since.
Bruh this is messed up probably and also weird and I feel like the old people would be mad at me...but bro. JFK's voice is sooooo soothing. It gives my heart a little flutter...weak in the knees n all that. And like I feel weird about it bc like...duh people back then were all googoo for him while he was in his prime...but I'm literally barely 21 years old and he's been dead for 60+ years wtf 😭 I feel weird but his voice is so cute!!! I don't even like politics!!! His speech impediment makes me happy u guys....Bruh this is messed up probably and also weird and I feel like the old people would be mad at me...but bro. JFK's voice is sooooo soothing. It gives my heart a little flutter...weak in the knees n all that. And like I feel weird about it bc like...duh people back then were all googoo for him while he was in his prime...but I'm literally barely 21 years old and he's been dead for 60+ years wtf 😭 I feel weird but his voice is so cute!!! I don't even like politics!!! His speech impediment makes me happy u guys. "Cahhhh" :>
I'm consumed by the feeling that I've been living someone else's life. Every decision, every relationship, every career move has been influenced by the expectations of others. I'm not sure who I am or what I want, and it's suffocating me.
After 20 years you texted me. It was like you put it in your calendar. It's something you would do.
You even had a picture of me as a teenager, before phones could take pictures. It means you saved it for some reason. Maybe you like to collect memories. I had to throw your pictures out... I just had to.
You were my first love and I died inside when I told you that I couldn't talk to you anymore. It was just too painful and I had to start to move on. But here, 20 years later, a text...After 20 years you texted me. It was like you put it in your calendar. It's something you would do.
You even had a picture of me as a teenager, before phones could take pictures. It means you saved it for some reason. Maybe you like to collect memories. I had to throw your pictures out... I just had to.
You were my first love and I died inside when I told you that I couldn't talk to you anymore. It was just too painful and I had to start to move on. But here, 20 years later, a text out of the blue.
I can't be friends with you. As much as I adored you, I just can't be friends. It would be too painful. I need to live my life with my wife and kids without distraction. I guess I never processed my pain, and it's just easier to keep it all buried.
Sorry, I hope you understand...
I still love you. But I can't know you.
If you see this, sorry I didn't reply.
After 20 years you texted me. It was like you put it in your calendar. It's something you would do.
You even had a picture of me as a teenager, before phones could take pictures. It means you saved it for some reason. Maybe you like to collect memories. I had to throw your pictures out... I just had to.
You were my first love and I died inside when I told you that I couldn't talk to you anymore. It was just too painful and I had to start to move on. But here, 20 years later, a text...After 20 years you texted me. It was like you put it in your calendar. It's something you would do.
You even had a picture of me as a teenager, before phones could take pictures. It means you saved it for some reason. Maybe you like to collect memories. I had to throw your pictures out... I just had to.
You were my first love and I died inside when I told you that I couldn't talk to you anymore. It was just too painful and I had to start to move on. But here, 20 years later, a text out of the blue.
I can't be friends with you. As much as I adored you, I just can't be friends. It would be too painful. I need to live my life with my wife and kids without distraction. I guess I never processed my pain, and it's just easier to keep it all buried.
Sorry, I hope you understand...
I still love you. But I can't know you.
If you see this, sorry I didn't reply.
Funny how I still adored him from afar even thought our path doesn't cross anymore. We don't talk, We don't give gaze and jokes towards each other yet I still couldn't believe I've stumbled upon the most gorgeous man ever.
I've been interested with this guy for 6 maybe 7 years even thought I never said a word about my feelings.
Even so my hope never cascade that one day he will say a word, maybe a call before the semester end since I'm permanently leaving my birth city.
Hey there, compadre! Your presence is a true gift in my day.
I was transported to a picturesque vineyard in Napa Valley while exploring your site, where every detail felt curated to perfection like a fine wine. The insightful articles and sophisticated design are crafted by a true connoisseur of quality!
Until next time, and may courage walk with you
FUNNY short conversation for you all. (It happened recently)
SCAMMER: "Hello Dear"
PERSON: "You scammers have to come up with something better then ""Hello Dear"". Cause it totally gives you away that your going to scam someone. Do you say that to men too? Wait that means your Bi right?"
SCAMMER: "WTF" BLOCK
PERSON: "ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!"
I am Dming a YouTuber whom I've passively watched since I was in middle school or something. I didn't have any crush or obsession before actually having real interactions with them but we've been messaging and even though he's decently older I think he's really attractive....